The Kitchen table

 Hello Again. It's been a busy couple of weeks.  I've been working on my downstairs bathroom.  We are in the process of renovating our house one room at a time. This ended up being a bit more hands on than I had planned.  The handyman wanted 800 dollars to lay tile in a three foot by five foot bathroom.  I learned how to tile. I'm pretty happy with the results. Tiling is pretty tricky.  If you don't lay it from the center, things can get wonky pretty quickly.  Before you know it, it looks like a blind, drunken idiot slapped tile down and glued it to the subfloor.   There are a lot of rules involved.   I was never a rule person.   It probably comes from being so heavily controlled until the age of 12.  I lose all patience about a minute into a recitation of 'why I must do something'.   Or at least I used to. Traditions had a similar feel to me.   It felt like another must do.  Somewhere inside, must do's became must don'ts.   That followed me all the way

 hello! I was going to write about something else entirely tonight, but this kind of asserted itself in the way ideas often do.  I couldn't get rid of it. It was my latest epiphany.    Which is:  "There is no such thing as closure." It's been years since I had one...an epiphany that is.   This lack of discovery had a lot to do with the single minded focus with which I led my life for the last five years.  My previous epiphany was "Don't spend your life doing things you hate."  Which lead to my single minded pursuit of a passion I dearly loved.  Followed ironically( a few years later) by "never say never."   When the thing I loved turned into a nightmare.  But I digress. That's quite a statement, isn't it. There is no such thing as closure.   Let me tell you, it's quite a conclusion to come to.   These epiphanies never happen in an elegant or comfortable space.  This epiphany happened in a trailer camper out back of my mom's hous